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Stick with your guns ..I have had an identical situation, but my friend said she would never go behind my back with my husband. But I caught her considering him giving him innuendoes she planned to sleep with him and I could see my partner becoming obsessed within the fantasy of experiencing her..She didn’t want him, she wanted him to went her..Ultimately it destroyed our friendship and almost my marriage and family..Keep a supervision on both ones.Because your husband remains to be wanting it again no matter how you’re feeling.. His desire to have her is strong and she or he would think coming from him..and like the validation Be careful best wishes..